Thematic Photographic - WOOD

Thematic Photographic

This week: WOOD

I had to really pick and choose as to what I was going to post for this week's theme photo, WOOD(click here to see more thematic photographics). I have tons of pics, and may have to do several posts! (Thanks Carmi)

I was strolling on the Bob Jones Parkway and came across this piece of almost petrified wood. The way it is weathered shows the age rings perfectly. 

I've decided that I must also wear my "age rings" and be proud of them, and not ashamed. The chemo kicked my ass and I'm pretty sure it changed my molecular structure! It added wrinkles, fat rolls, crows feet, brow furrows, radiation tattoos, tummy bulges, scars across both breasts and one on my neck, cottage cheese thighs, and if you think I sound hot now, you should see me naked!

But each of those little "age rings" makes me proud to be where I am today. I am almost at 6 years from my original breast cancer diagnosis, and guess what? 

I FEEL GREAT! And my hubby still thinks I am beautiful. 

Just like this piece of wood. Just because it has been cut off it's original trunk, and thrown to the side of the road, it is still beautiful, and not forgotten. It is just spectacular in a completely different way. 

Today, try looking at things differently, and not just what is new and cool and shiny. Be kind, for everybody has been through some sort of battle, whether they show it on the outside, or wear it on the inside. 

And celebrate YOUR age rings!

Wordless Wednesday - HOT!

Foundry metal shop

Improg #5 - NONSENSE!

This week's improg word is good. It's easy to play along. Simply visit the site during the week, check what the IMPROG word is and blog about it. Leave a comment with a link to your blog, and we can visit other people's interpretations of the word. 

At first I was going to blog about no-nonsense pantyhose. I was going to talk about how old they were, and how that was the cool thing when I started wearing pantyhose. And then I googled them. I found out that they came out in the late 70's. That wasn't THAT long ago. And then I felt old. And then I decided I don't even really like pantyhose, so why the hell would I even want to talk about it? 

So, switching gears here, I told you that my Mom used to make TJ & I matching outfits. And I bet that you thought that was a bunch of nonsense. I'm here to tell you, it's not nonsense! 

Green & white checked polyester gingham matching outfits. I had a dress and a jacket. And white kneesocks and white patent leather shoes. It probably would have looked better if I had some no-nonsense pantyhose on. 

TJ was lucky, he had the one piece. Alhtough, I can't tell what is on the front of his. An ice cream cone? A wizard? Santa Claus in his summer suit? And there is some sort of weehaw that must be on my outfit, or it is pasted onto TJ's head. How could the Sears photographer not have seen that? Probably because he was too busy worrying about wether he had enough combs for all the screaming, snot nose kids in line.  

And how about those buckteeth of mine? I had a way of shoving my tongue right behind them so you can't really tell I am missing most of my teeth. ALMOST as cool as Dr. Bukk's.

I carry around my Dr. Bukk's in my purse right now. The only thing that would make them cooler would be a green and white checked gingham polyester outfit. I'll keep my eye out for one. 

Anyway, you can now see. It wasn't nonsense at all. Jealous, aren't you? 

THEMATIC PHOTOGRAPHIC: Through the glass...

THEMATIC PHOTOGRAPHIC

Earthquake retrofits abound in the little town of San Luis Obispo, California. A "small" project like this will cost the owner close to a million dollars. 

This was taken through the window of what once was a great clothing store. 

April 2008

Susan, AlwaysAnEditor made me do this. 

Carmi, Written, Inc made her do it. 

IMPROG - KNOCKERS is the word of the day!

Visit here to see what improgging is all about! You, too, can blog about knockers!
Come on, you know you want to! (Everybody's doing it)

Remember the movie Young Frankenstein from 1974 (starring Gene Wilder, Peter Boyle, Marty Feldman and Cloris Leachman)? 

I have several favorite scenes from the movie, but one of the best is when Inga and Inspector Kemp (Teri Garr and Kenneth Mars) are standing in front of the huge castle doors. 

The Inspector says, “My what big knockers!”

Inga thrusts her chest out and says “Why, thank you!”

It just goes to show you that knockers are all in the interpretation.

There are big knockers and little knockers, medium knockers, perfect knockers, not so perfect knockers and even door knockers.

I used to have perfect knockers. They were tight and high and fabulous. I had a friend who was getting a boob job and she asked if she could take a picture and show it to the doctor so he would know what she was looking for.

And then I was diagnosed with cancer at age 36. My poor knockers never stood a chance against that one! I vainly decided for a lumpectomy so I wouldn’t lose my hair. Vanity being a bitch and all, my cancer was aggressive so I ended up with chemo and losing my hair, and having one breast that is an entire cup size different. Bra shopping is not fun. In fact, bra wearing is not fun. The poor smaller boob has been nuked by the radiation so much that it is riddled with scar tissue and feels like a cantaloupe (except not as big as a cantaloupe), although it does stand at attention. And the other one, well, gravity is starting to take its toll on that one. As far as the nipples go, well, think about Marty Feldman's eyes - one goes this way, and one goes that way.

I'm not gonna lie, for the past few years, this has really bothered me. And then I figured it out!

Boobs may come, and boobs may go,

but funny lasts forever.

~~ Hayley Townley, June 2008 ~~ 

~~ Hayley Townley, June 2008 ~~ 

P.S. I'm a guest blogger today at moritherapy's blog - her topic today is cancer. Please take a few moments to visit and see what I have to say over there! 

WORDLESS Wednesday - Unfortunate sign placement!

IMPROG - FAIR

Todays improg word is FAIR.

When I first saw it, I was perplexed - because it really does conjure up different things. Margerie used hers and it is very funny - be sure to check her improg out, of course, after you read mine :-) And visit the improgging site to participate or read others interpretations of todays improg word!

I was going to do some sort of rhyme with hair and fair and bare and scare, but that is just stupid (unless you are going to improg it that way, then it isn’t stupid).

It isn’t fair that I got cancer.
It isn’t fair that I lost my hair with the chemo.
It isn’t fair that I gained weight with the chemo.
Okay, I'm over it, I'll quit whining. Thanks for listening!

But you want to know what really, really isn’t FAIR????

What is not fair is that I am in fullblown menopause at age 41. And no, I can’t take hormones for it (my cancer was estrogen positive).

Remember those rolling brownouts that we were having last summer? I’m pretty sure it was my fault. My hotflashes make me miserable!

Then there’s the flabby arms I’m trying to hide. It isn’t fair that I can’t wear long sleeve shirts all the time, because of the hotflashes.

What about the mood swings? Aren’t those great? I guess it depends on what side of the mood you are on. My poor BHF.

So, you have a hot sweaty 41 year old bitch with flabby arms in a tank top who is also really nice sometimes. And crying. ANd has to pee, again. Is that sexy or what?

I can take natural stuff. And if I wanted, I could take anti-depressants. If you know me, you know I am one of the least depressed people you know, so that is another thing that is just stupid.

I would eat dog poo if I thought it would help me. Of course, I would insist that it be fried first!

And where is Dr. Pierce when you need him? I have this bottle that I got at an estate sale - it’s his F.P. Favorite Prescription.

DIRECTIONS: Take 2 teaspoonfuls with water 4 times a day after meals and at bedtime.

(For some crazy reason, all I can think of is Lucille Ball and vitametavegamin.)




On the side of the box, it says:

WOMEN having the symptoms often associated with CHANGE OF LIFE, “FEMALE NERVES” AND PERIODIC MENSTRUAL PAIN have for years found this medicine of great value when taken regularly and as directed. It has a gentle stomachic conic effect. It was originally developed in his practice by Dr. R. V. Pierce.

I googled him. He was born in 1840. He went to The Eclectic Medical College of Cincinnati. The bottle that I have was from January 1949. The guy may have been a genius in marketing, but what he was missing was that the change of life women don’t have periods! And he didn’t put any alcohol in it. Two strikes.




Anyway, you can bet that if it was still on the shelves, I would buy it and try it. As would all the other women who are complaining about menopause!

It’s too bad it isn’t around anymore. It’s just not fair!

IMPROG - FAIR

Today's IMPROG word is FAIR. 

I'll tell you what's not fair. I have an entire post written about this and blogger is having internal problems with uploading images. And the photos really make the post. Trust me. 

Check back. 

This is isn't fair. 

IMPROG #2: MUSIC

**

There is a new site to deal specifically with improgging! They choose the word, I write about it. WOOHOO. Never will I lack blog fodder again. The brilliant thing about improgging? You can put as much, or as little, time into it. The first thing that pops into your head. You can also visit others who are writing about todays improgging word. Today for me is a quickie.

IMPROG word is MUSIC.  


I am a rocker chick, a jazz lover, a shower singer, a car superstar (I amuse traffic), and I dig the oldies of my parents and grandparents generation. I'm a product of the 80's who loves the big hair bands and my formative years were shaped by disco in the 70's.

My husband (BHF) is a guy who hated disco in the 70’s, and grew up listening to 70's rock.We both still love to go to concerts.

Of course, we make little sacrifices for each other when going to see music:

ME: I’ll trade you my Van Halen, for your Eagles.

In this example, these are both brilliant bands, so there isn’t much negotiation there.

This is true negotiation:
BHF: I’ll trade you my Alice Cooper for Morrissey.

Then there are other simply great bands. No negotiations needed:
 RUSH. And Elton John. And Godsmack. And Hoobastank. And Jimmy Buffet. And ZZ Top. And Blue Oyster Cult. And YES.

Back to negotiations:
BHF: I’ll go see a baseball game while you go see KC & The Sunshine Band.
ME: I’ll go see Mamma Mia in Vegas while you are gambling with the boys.

BHF: You can go see Storm Large with Julie. 

ME: You can stay home and wash my car. *

But tonight?
BHF is headed to see Ted Nugent in Pozo.
I’m headed to see Menopause the Musical in Cambria.

There are no amount of negotiations that could get us through sitting through each other’s picks tonight. Not even the ever popular rock-paper-scissors, which solves many an argument in our household.

BHF: Have a great time. You’re going to listen to menopausal women sing. How fun for you.
ME: You’re going to listen to a guy who actually named one of his albums SCREAM DREAM. How fun for you.
US: I’ll meet you back here on the couch afterwards for some TV and maybe a little slap-n-tickle.

It’s all about negotiations, baby!

* no cars were washed, no scissors were smashed, no paper was cut and no armadillos were harmed during the negotiations of todays improg word. 

Now that's trust.

That's me and my little brother, TJ. I'm the one with the sporty Dorothy Hamill haircut, in case you were unsure.

This picture was taken when I was about 10 or 11, and TJ was almost 3. I'm guessing it was 1977. it was for sure taken in Farmington, New Mexico in front of my Grandmother's house, prior to them ripping the grass out and putting down colored rocks (but two colors  of rocks so it looked nicer). Whoever was taking the picture had to have been standing in the middle of the road (that's trust). 

You'll notice that TJ's feet aren't even on the pedals, because I was pushing with one foot on the trike, and the other one on the back of it. I had a grip on TJ's shoulders that probably left not only bruises, but permanent indentations as well. I like the way his socks match his shorts. I opted for no socks. At least in this picture we didn't have our regular matching outfits that Mom made us. (I am NOT making that up).

The photographer really captured the thrilling moment of it all. They managed to get the shadow in the entire picture. That must have been hard because we were probably going 15 miles an hour. Or maybe not. 

I'd like to point out the reason a trike works is balance and leverage. The front wheel is bigger than the back two and is centered. I'd also like to point out that I am centered on the trike as well, as is TJ. I'd also like you to notice that I am a wee bit bigger than the front wheel of the bike. But anybody who has ever ridden a bike and tried to do a wheelie knows that you must get all the weight on the back of the bike. 

Anyway, the photo was also taken about 30 seconds before the entire trike tipped backwards from the weight of me standing on it. And regardless of the grip I had on TJ's shoulders, I was able to jump off it and roll into the dirt, unharmed. 

TJ, on the other hand, had nobody to break his fall (I was safely on the dirt lawn) and cracked his head open. He bled all over the sidewalk and really made a mess. I seem to remember he cried a lot. I don't really remember anything else about this moment. What I do know is that our adrenaline addiction started way before we could stop it. 

I can't believe we are still best friends after that (and other) fiascos! Now, that's trust. 

Love you TJ! 

Wordless Wednesday - AIRPLANE!

IMPROG - CONNECTION!

So, there is a new site with actual suggested IMPROG words on it. This makes for much easier blog fodder. Today's word is CONNECTION.

If you are interested in joining the latest trend, be sure to RSS it. They will be posting twice a week - once on Monday for your work day and once on Friday for your weekend!

As I was headed into the kitchen, I was contemplating the word: CONNECTION. Should I write about LinkedIn, one of my new favorite obsessions? Should I write about my internet connection and how we are all spoiled rotten because I could have never even imagined blogging (reading or writing) with dial up. And it wasn't THAT long ago that is what we all had. 

And then it happened. I stepped on my poor kitty's tail. She howled, I screamed (I wasn't at all sure it was my cat, and you know how I am about wild animals stalking me. If not, you can read about them here: blue jays or the mouse). I made an incredible connection with my foot to her tail.

That'll teach her to be in my way.
Or it might teach me to look where I am going.

Fabulous Woman Party

A few weeks ago, Margerie & I were invited to a Fabulous Woman Party by our mutual friend, Jean Steel. Neither of us knew but one or two of the people who were going to be attending.

Jean said we could dress up (you will often find her in a tiara). In fact, she encouraged people to wear tiaras, because she says that any day is a good day for a tiara. 

I called Margerie earlier that day, and said, "Hey! Do you want to have some fun tonight?"
You can tell that Margerie doesn't get to hang around me quite enough, because she immediately said, "SURE". She didn't ask me anything prior to committing. 

We walked into the party, Margerie with her wings on, I with a magic wand. Everybody thought it was great.


But the people who really enjoyed it were Danica Patrick & Betty Crocker who showed up about halfway through the party. 



After all, they are fabulous women too, and were thrilled to be there. 

Things you should know about me

10 things you should know about me: 

1. I'm funny. 

2. I remember everything. If I don't remember it, it didn't happen. 

3. I know lots of useless information (like who invented the toilet or what movie was playing at the drive in during the beginning of The Flintstones)

4. I'm loud! 

5. Once you are in my circle of trust, there is absolutely nothing I won't do for you. 

6. I'm not bossy, I just know what you should be doing. 

7. I have little patience for bullshit. 

8. I collect people with terrific personalities who make me laugh.

9. I hate to vacuum. 

10. I am addicted to my computer.

11. I can throw a dinner party for 12 together in 2 hours. 

12. I often stretch the truth, which is why I said 10 things you should know, even though I put down 12.  

Wordless Wednesday - TURKEY!!

IMPROG: Travel is the word

improg: travel
6/3/08


Susan has been very good at improgging, so she guilted me into it today. She didn't even try, I just felt that she was holding up her end of the bargain, and I was not. So here we go!

Today’s improg word is travel. I have been very remiss in my improgging (but not my blogging, I hope you understand the difference). One of the main reasons is because I have been traveling a bit. 

Not the kind of traveling I would like to be doing, but traveling, just the same. And, after all, we can’t always be going somewhere tropical, so we may as well still be going somewhere. The point is that we can.

Since my last improg, I have traveled to:

• the gym
  
• Joe Momma’s Coffee in Avila
  
• the salon to get my haircut
  
• my dog’s agility training
  
• Magic Mountain
  
• a purse party
  
• the apple store (have I told you I love my computer?)
  
• the Fremont Theatre to see Pulp Fiction on the big screen
  
• the store to panic buy carrots
  
• Cal Poly’s Relay for Life where I was the speaker for opening ceremonies
  
• Pismo Beach to find a tenant for a rental (4 times)
  
• Grizzly Academy at Camp San Luis to make C-Cards (more on that later)
  
• my annual breast MRI and bone density scan
  
• my oncologists for a check up (he doesn’t want to see me for 6 months - yay!)
  
• my surgeon for a check up (he doesn’t want to see me for 1 year - double yay!)
  
• SF Bay Area to see my BFF-Julie and hang out at Cabana Dan’s
  
• Nipomo to show houses
  
• Atascadero to an e-commerce talk sponsored by CCWN
  

So, all in all, even though I say I need a vacation, and even though I say I haven’t gone anywhere in awhile, quite the opposite is true. I have been traveling!

Just not the toes in the sand and wear your swimsuit to lunch kind of vacation I think of when I think of travel.

I need to plan a vacation.

As Susan stated, we are almost out of random words and we will need to send each other more. We would love to have you improg with us, so if you are interested in improgging, shoot me an email or leave me a comment. Let's start a trend!!!!!! Come on all you bloggers out there (Margerie). 

Guerilla Marketing

You have to admit this is brilliant, guerilla marketing. Especially since I don't have children. I just pick random kids out of the grocery store to attach stickers to. (What else am I going to do with 5000 stickers?)

In fact, I don't even like children. Except when they are fried, cuz then they taste like chicken.